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The post Lifestyle Guru, Life Skills That Matter, Stephen Warley Show 003 first appeared on mitchellchadrow.com
Transcript Show 003
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1:00all back at Mitchell Chad row.com / side
1:05we are so glad to have with us today
1:07even from the unstoppable podcast there
1:10was a hundred and fifty-nine episode and
1:12in that podcast he talked about all
1:15things to which he freedom instability
1:17how to build new habitats and build more
1:20meaningful live now on to our shop so
1:22let’s jump right in doing some of the
1:24gaps Steven tell us about your personal
1:26story well catch everybody up as of
1:29today I’m in the process of building a
1:31new business inspired by all the great
1:33researching interview i collected from
1:35tactical and technical I feel that
1:37matter and its really focusing on these
1:40skills that I think that I are very
1:43important that haven’t been that’s early
1:45talk to it’s pointless formerly that
1:47will really help you make a become
1:49self-reliant really actually probably go
1:51from my pocket I think kind of the thing
1:54i’m not a excited about helping people
1:56transition from that employee mindset to
1:59herself and point but it’s a very
2:01different lifestyle with different very
2:03different way of working looking at your
2:05money but your time and energy and I
2:07just want to help people prepare for
2:09that really understand
2:11what is the lungs that whatever it feels
2:12like a habit need to be as successful as
2:15possible when they start working for
2:16themselves very different one certainly
2:19a good point and that is the mindset of
2:22an employee to a entrepreneur someone
2:25who is starting up and so what is a
2:28career transition coach because you know
2:30you hear a lot of buzzwords today you
2:32know whether it be a digital therapist
2:34or whether it be a career transition
2:36coach so why don’t you enlighten people
2:38as to you know what that is and some
2:41practical tips or things that people can
2:43do today to sort of get into that
2:45mindset and some of this able to able to
2:47help them with on this new podcast I
2:49think before you make an investment in
2:52your life coaching coach career coach
2:55objects etc I think it’s really
2:56important to be as clear as possible
2:58about why you want to make the change
3:00you want to making your life
3:02I think you’re not going to get the most
3:03from the time spent with working
3:06one-on-one with something like that
3:07unless you understand why you’re doing
3:08it
3:09why why you’re doing what you’re about
3:10to do and it you know just saying that
3:13your job is miserable and I can’t do it
3:14anymore is not good enough you really
3:16have to figure out what is that thing
3:18that does motivate you with that problem
3:19that you want to solve what is a group
3:21of people that you want to block weather
3:23how do you want to work differently
3:24yeah be clear about that and then I it
3:26is kyle worthwhile for many people to
3:28work was like that I like that I happen
3:31to be more of an advocate of really
3:33working with groups of people finding a
3:35community of people who are doing what
3:36you want to do outside I about 15 years
3:39ago so I’ve been fascinated with
3:41analyzing researching everything people
3:44that alternative ways of working and the
3:45one of that you need to do what you want
3:47to make a transition from one lifestyle
3:49to another in this case from employee to
3:51self-employment I the ipod the
3:53entrepreneurial path you have to be
3:54around people who are doing that will
3:56want to do it because when you start
3:58trying to change yourself in the context
4:00of a group you see other possibility see
4:03people of peace steps ahead of you so
4:05you get turned into a belief like it
4:07they can do it I know I can do it
4:08sometimes when you’re working when I was
4:10an expert somebody kind of forget where
4:12they came from and you’re not really
4:14getting as many different perspectives
4:15but I think working for a group
4:17especially to this early stage of making
4:20that transition is super important and
4:21with the web today there’s just so many
4:23different
4:24you know mention that you can find to
4:25podcasts blog form social media mobile
4:29apps there’s just so many different ways
4:30to reach out and find people who are
4:32doing what you want to do so that’s
4:33probably by most important piece of
4:35advice because i also love helping
4:37people make one big decision like that
4:39and then all of a sudden all different
4:41aspects of their life started to change
4:42and transform as a result of that one
4:44decision
4:45I’m not an advocate up here’s the big
4:46checklist your big plan do exactly what
4:49I did because everybody’s different
4:50everybody has a different personality
4:52and ability strength energy to find your
4:55own way and that’s the context of the
4:58group and that’s how I actually came
4:59across you on the unstoppable podcast
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5:31wrap-up room for all my graphic design I
5:34was so impressed with this company that
5:36I actually interviewed the founder
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5:40Mitchell Chad row.com / show 028 to
5:44start your snapper designgraphic today
5:46going over to Mitchell chatroulette.com
5:48/ snap because not only did I find your
5:52content to be rich and inspiring but i
5:55also found myself trusting you and
5:58listening to you and in doing tonight it
6:04was it was kind of it was kind of like a
6:07friend was talking to me and someone
6:09that I could sort of relate to someone
6:12who I believed in and someone I kind of
6:16you know I couldn’t wait to call it
6:18somehow get a little bit more the next
6:20day and so that kind of take me into my
6:22next
6:22yeah I don’t know absolutely and so that
6:24why you know i’m excited i know that
6:27audience is going to be very excited to
6:28hear you because again when you can
6:31couple someone who’s good at what they
6:33do but someone who’s trustworthy and
6:35someone who’s reliable and dependable I
6:37think that’s really a home run and that
6:40had really what our audience is looking
6:42for and you’re catching me in the middle
6:44of a transition you know I was a
6:45broadcast sales trainer or about a dozen
6:48years that’s pretty much how I work for
6:50myself for that long and now i’m going
6:52into this new environment where i want
6:54to commit to everything that i started
6:55let’s talk about to the new business so
6:57I think it’s really fun to be able to
7:00talk to people who are going to
7:02transition while I’m going for
7:03transition because to your point
7:04actually like I can relate to them what
7:06works I’m going but they’re going right
7:09now that I’ve been through it a few more
7:11time because I’ve been doing this for 15
7:13years so I kind of know where some of
7:15the pitfalls are just excited to help
7:16others learn how to look out for them or
7:19how they can avoid them sometimes some
7:20of them are just on the boil big part of
7:22this process
7:23no mistake experimenting and learning
7:25things yourself and that takes me into
7:26how do you define success
7:29maybe tell the audience a story of
7:31success that you’ve had and then we’ll
7:34flip that on its head and maybe tell us
7:36a story of failure but actually how you
7:39learned from that story of failure and
7:42maybe some practical things that the
7:43audience can kind of take away from your
7:46experience in failing and maybe you know
7:48help them so that they don’t have to
7:50sort of go through that maybe some
7:52practical things that they can kind of
7:54take away and sort of get get up to
7:56speed a little bit faster from from you
7:59know lessons learned that that you’ve
8:01you’ve gained from some of those
8:03failures and some of those successes so
8:06many failures which one of the best 11
8:11that that that you think people can
8:13learn the most practical tips from and
8:16kind of take away you know one or two
8:18little nuggets of of goodness that they
8:21can learn from that wisdom and then I
8:23think that they could also learn from a
8:25story of success and how to apply those
8:27things in their everyday life
8:30you’re quite simply I define success as
8:32being able to be myself one hundred
8:34percent of the time because i think when
8:36you are an employee
8:38that’s not possible i think most people
8:41aren’t working on in alignment with the
8:43are they conformed how it is supposed to
8:46work inside of a company or the force to
8:48hack our entire educational system is
8:50designed to conform to a certain working
8:53standards all done for us and it’s a
8:56very radical step when want to be
8:58self-employed having control of
9:02everything that you do so i define
9:04success number one by being yourself one
9:07hundred percent of the time
9:08number two is having control my time I
9:11don’t really care for another
9:12millionaire billionaire money is
9:14something that is necessarily and
9:16certainly as I’ve accumulated more of it
9:18hasn’t made my life easier
9:19yes at the end of the day be able to
9:22control and do and direct my life in
9:25every way that i want to its success to
9:28me
9:28for example i prided myself on for years
9:31not whatever waking up to an alarm when
9:34everybody body was ready to get up
9:36that’s when I got out that was freedom
9:37to me that success i do a lot of
9:40traveling
9:41I do a lot of the trips in a way that I
9:45think a lot of people think my gosh how
9:46to be able to do that because that’s my
9:49hobby i found a way to fund it i want to
9:51find a way to be frugal about it and
9:52budget for product properly and made the
9:55time for it i’m taking I take four to
9:56six weeks vacation every single year i
9:59think that should be the ones i don’t
10:01think two weeks should be normal i
10:04remember not to like go to the deep end
10:07of the pool go to a dark place but i
10:09think this is a really important example
10:11of how I define success and control over
10:12time my grandmother had kidney failure
10:16towards the end of her life she decided
10:18not to get dialysis I talked to a friend
10:20of mine who was a nurse that night she
10:23said you should go visit your
10:24grandmother right now she probably is a
10:25couple of love and I got a butterfly
10:30that night I was at her bedside less
10:33than 12 hours later in Florida totally
10:35she was buying normal talk to her that’s
10:37kind of interesting wrinkle of her
10:40current stage but i would I got to be
10:42there and if i was working for somebody
10:45they probably would have counted
10:46personal days against me or our habitat
10:49vacation time they literally would have
10:50charged to go see my dying grandmother
10:53and that is just the thing to me and I
10:58got those are the type of thing I
11:00remember once my mother when I was
11:03starting out just like we do you really
11:04want no I paused didn’t have an
11:07immediate answers answers that you know
11:09what you want given what you want time
11:11and said you know what mom you’re
11:13exactly what that is what I want and I’m
11:16a person who is very highly motivated
11:19suffer from chronic anxiety throughout
11:21my adult career and I final result
11:23because I want to be myself and i’m
11:25having my kicking it you now hopefully
11:27with life skills that matter that i can
11:29find my life doubt but I get paid to be
11:32who I want to be and I don’t feel like
11:34you have to be somebody else and I think
11:36there’s a lot of people who can relate
11:37to that that even if you’re some people
11:40might totally being a fraud or being
11:42taken effect
11:43there’s always some action there’s
11:45always some little part of ourselves
11:46everyday while working for somebody else
11:48they’re like you know what I feel
11:50uncomfortable with this this is just not
11:52me
11:52so that is my story of how a success now
11:57we would like to talk about some of your
11:59site that’s that’s that’s definitely
12:02true because again you know the failures
12:07sometimes can teach us more and i think
12:11that with the audience hearing some of
12:14the things that maybe you failed on you
12:19know the lessons that you’ve learned
12:21maybe it will prevent somebody else from
12:23having to sort of go down that rabbit
12:25hole
12:26and not have to sort of repeat the same
12:29types of things so you know at the end
12:31of the day we like to try to be
12:33practical and we’d like people to sort
12:36of take away some things that they can
12:37learn that they can implement that they
12:40can actually execute right away
12:42starting today and so maybe with a story
12:45or two that would be most helpful to
12:47them i think a recent failure was on
12:51will be completely honest with you I’m
12:53from a business point of view
12:55unstoppable with a failure
12:57it never made any money I looking back I
13:01i was coming out of I was ready to make
13:03a change in my direction of my career
13:06and I was searching around for lots of
13:09different options with with my blind
13:11friend and colleague Chris Walton and
13:14this is something that we had fallen
13:15into and now looking back at this is
13:17what I’ve always lost year has really
13:18helped people that you know what there
13:20is another way to work you don’t have to
13:21do what you can talk seriously and
13:24that’s kind of level as the lighting my
13:26fire
13:27you know I’ve interviewed hundreds of
13:28people on the topic i’ve read hundreds
13:30of books from you know I can’t tell you
13:33how many hours of research around us but
13:35I’d never thought as my calling until i
13:37started doing that suckable that is a
13:41success point of view through the group
13:42amazing research project and I’m so glad
13:45that we got to connect Mitchell I I know
13:47you feel like you learned a lot from
13:49listening to those pockets but i can’t
13:50tell you how much I got to learn and to
13:53know there’s a real opportunity here and
13:56but for the business point of view it
13:58was a failure because we went into it
14:02without recognizing clearly identifying
14:04the problem and how we’re going to solve
14:06the problem how we’re going to get to
14:08that number one that’s one of the basic
14:10world was actually the first physical
14:12free started business you have to learn
14:14about yourself first
14:15and that’s something i’m developing how
14:17to methodically understand yourself
14:19another resource I think too many times
14:21you will jump into starting a business
14:23is like that person to stay a hundred
14:25thousand dollars in two months I want to
14:27be just like that and it’s like you
14:29aren’t that you are you and you have
14:31different habits you have different
14:32abilities from them and that’s what we
14:35will have to ask yourself first to
14:36understand that you are the first root
14:38source of your business and step two is
14:40you have to be clear about what a
14:42problem i’m trying to stop it because
14:43business is slowly exist to solve
14:46problem got it and I think hurts and i
14:50made a mistake in that your good friends
14:52we were really aligned in and our
14:55interests but we started the business
14:59because we want to work with each other
15:00as friends and that is not a good reason
15:02to start a business and as it turns out
15:05Kristin had very different working very
15:08hard work styles variable work value
15:10minor valid is about agents in online
15:13and we spent a lot of time and effort
15:15trying to figure out how to work
15:16together and that took away a lot of
15:19energy from trying to figure out how to
15:21turn up chuckles we’ll business so I
15:23think what I’ve learned in the context
15:25about that script but a lot of my past
15:27business partnerships that you really
15:29have to understand we’re going to enter
15:30and put into a partnership with somebody
15:32you have to understand what is it that
15:35you need that they’re bringing to the
15:37table they have to be bringing something
15:39to the table that you don’t have and
15:41that you really need to make the project
15:43of business you want to work on
15:44successful if you don’t have that that’s
15:47a problem with the red flag
15:48you also have to understand each other’s
15:50personalities you working to work it out
15:52to figure out like how could we
15:54complement each other how can we make
15:55that strengthen each other and work from
15:57each other and make each other better if
16:00you don’t have that that’s also going to
16:02be a major problem so I think it’s
16:05somewhere he does that you know looking
16:07at cycle from the sellers of business
16:09it’s really understanding partnership
16:11but also really understanding yourself
16:12first got to be mistake most people make
16:16you know when I was listening to you on
16:18unstoppable you know because you’re so
16:20likeable I was always rooting for you
16:23and you know when you decide again
16:27well I most certainly and i’ll tell you
16:29what everybody in the audience is going
16:31to root for you because not only are you
16:33smart not only you’re good at what you
16:35do
16:36not only does your passion come through
16:37but i think that you know your you sound
16:41and you come across like a very likeable
16:43and a good person and someone and
16:46everyone out there could really learn
16:48something from you so you know I’m not
16:50excited actually for you are and that
16:53kind of gets me into the to the next
16:55question that is so going forward
16:57starting today and I know that you’ve
16:59talked about about a lot of things that
17:01you learn from that failure as you as
17:03you put it a and being you know a
17:06failure
17:07what does success look like for you
17:10today going forward
17:12I mean if you had to do it all over
17:14again and obviously it sounds like on
17:17this next start off this next venture
17:20that you’re having this next podcast
17:22because there’s so many people that want
17:23to start podcast for so many people that
17:25want to sort of get started
17:28what what does that success or what does
17:31that podcast or what do you do to sort
17:34of make those changes today because you
17:37know a lot of people have great ideas
17:38out there but unless you execute on
17:41those ideas you know and and sort of
17:44learn from what you’ve done in the past
17:45you know it’s going to continue to
17:47repeat itself so maybe you could take
17:49someone threw that mindset to be
17:52practical and helpful to them right now
17:54absolutely i have made I’m breaking my
17:57pattern and I’m making one huge promise
18:00to myself I am working in complete
18:04alignment with my habits my work eat my
18:07motivation and my values i can’t say
18:11that I’ve been able to do that one
18:12hundred percent of the time even while
18:13I’ve been working for myself and one
18:16well I’ll tell you what time because i’m
18:20excited i know the audience is excited
18:22when you have your podcast I’d be more
18:24than happy to come on with you any
18:26time to help you in that success because
18:30you know when you can bring people
18:32together that one a route for other
18:33people that want to see other people
18:35succeed and to thrive and to do it i
18:38think that your example of what can be
18:41done i think is the best motivator for
18:45anybody else to say you know what I can
18:47do it and not only can i do it but I’m
18:49going to execute on whatever it is that
18:51I’m that I set my mind to that kind of
18:53time helping me about goals mean can you
18:56define what our goal is and how that’s
18:58important to people and and why people
19:00should sort of set goals and meaningful
19:03goals and how do you sort of go about
19:05doing that because i know just from
19:06listening to some of my favorite
19:08podcasts that you had one of them was
19:11about being a minimalist and I remember
19:13you getting so passionate and so excited
19:15about that how do you kind of apply that
19:18to sort of setting goals and how you
19:20define goals and how people can sort of
19:23start today and sort of moving closer
19:26and closer to sort of executing on those
19:28well first I would love to have you on
19:31if I go just having a podcast again and
19:34I couldn’t agree more i mean really is
19:36coming together that went to that
19:37principle hang out with like minded
19:39people that’s where the magic happens
19:40human being for he evolved to work with
19:44each other not allow
19:46and and so to this way a kind of
19:50understanding what i’m going to be doing
19:51different setting gold that first thing
19:54is really being concrete on my habits
19:56and really being aligned with myself but
19:59some gold up you have to be clear about
20:01your why why am I doing this I believe
20:04everybody has an untold story and they
20:07deserve to be given permission to
20:08finally tell the story by actually
20:11taking action to do it to design their
20:13lifestyles around look they both want to
20:15do that’s what gets me out of bed every
20:17single day I’m going to find a solution
20:19to that problem and I think that begin
20:24by I get the type of business model
20:26there’s a lot of different person falls
20:27out that right and I think I’d better
20:29help to help people understand if you
20:31want to go in the direction he somebody
20:34really successful affiliate marketing to
20:36get to set successful the podcast so
20:38many successful selling training
20:39something successful going the product
20:41and they’re making x-men dollars on a
20:42certain amount of time and that’s going
20:43president going to take people making me
20:46try to copy that person for Batum and I
20:49think you really need to be inspired by
20:51that person not copy them really
20:53understand their habits but making them
20:55your own two legs to what works four
20:58year because that’s the thing that
20:59doesn’t work out for people people
21:01people have a hard time getting started
21:02because they don’t know enough about
21:05themselves and what they really King
21:07start on first or tackle first and they
21:09get started they don’t keep that
21:12momentum going because it turns out this
21:14is a hard top lifestyle the hard path
21:17this is not easy it’s very helpful
21:19motivated there’s no longer is no
21:21structure telling you what you have to
21:23do every day so my very simple analogy
21:27of the kind of business laws that I like
21:29it
21:29it involved be clear why with that
21:31problem resolved and trying to create a
21:33lot of content to address that probably
21:35answer interesting questions that people
21:37have about that problem and creating
21:39content that addresses those question
21:41that content then attract the community
21:43start engaging with can you get more
21:45questions you don’t really understand
21:47you have some beta testers you do a lot
21:49of serving so don’t really have to set
21:50of nuances up with a problem that they
21:53want to have solved and what they’re
21:54willing to pay to have that solved and
21:56then finally the cash comes along
21:58that’s when you can start selling very
22:00specific solution but he probably had no
22:02idea you would have uncovered when you
22:04started this process that some people
22:07think oh my god campus because that’s
22:09all I can’t believe this
22:10somebody haven’t done this before and
22:12it’s at the part that I want to pay that
22:14is the pathway to success in these new
22:17types of business models whether it ends
22:19up being a product that you’re going to
22:20sell or the training or some other sort
22:23of service that is the basic way to be
22:26starting I and I think the believer not
22:29my optical looking at goals goals our
22:32guidepost but really it’s about getting
22:35clear on your habits my core habits are
22:37the types of businesses i felt about
22:38writing and creating content about
22:41collecting questions and answering that
22:42I’m listening to the community and
22:44finally managing that community I think
22:46once again another thing people get
22:47caught up and when you think of business
22:49school to get caught up too much in the
22:50tactical aspects of business of
22:53accounting and marketing and all the
22:55local a quick little trick the hax you
22:57can do is that stuff important
22:59absolutely but it’s not the stuff you
23:01should not be myopically focused on you
23:03really have to focus on your habits
23:06first and then worry about the result so
23:09when I right now i’m writing a lot of
23:10constant need to start off with a blog
23:12the time of the podcast so i would I
23:15didn’t say i’m going to set a goal of
23:17underwrite 3,000 words a day I had to do
23:20that that would be a lot of pressure to
23:22live up to what I did for the first
23:24couple of weeks I said you know what I’m
23:26a really good morning worker that’s when
23:28I like to work and I could work through
23:30the four hours including the type of
23:32high-level quality content so I
23:34discovered after a couple of weeks I
23:35look back and I looked at my word count
23:37i did an average of two thousand work
23:39today is that ok that is that’s what I
23:42do this is my my habit now I can look
23:45for ways to adjust them inside
23:47can I do a little better or is this
23:49really my average so that’s how I
23:51believe in focus on those habits first
23:53then focus on the resultant see how you
23:55can make a little bit more effective or
23:57efficient especially the limited use of
23:59time and energy
24:00the reason why i chose audible to
24:02sponsor my face picture and that’s easy
24:05i love books and audible is owned by a
24:07powerful company
24:08amazon that
24:10dance behind all their product audible
24:12was willing to offer an exclusive free
24:1430-day trial of my podcast listeners
24:17with one free audiobook download any
24:19listener doesn’t like they’re both
24:21audible exchange it for you and you can
24:23cancel at anytime horrible allows you to
24:25keep your free download and you can
24:27choose from over a hundred and eighty
24:29thousand bestsellers new releases
24:31classics and more i recommend the last
24:34lecture by randy posh so dream big
24:36get inspired and listen up on over to
24:39Mitchell chatroulette.com / audible I’ll
24:42tell you I’m really excited and
24:45genuinely thrilled because it sounds as
24:47if you’ve done a lot of thinking since
24:49you’re called failure
24:52well with unstoppable and I’m excited
24:54not only am I excited for you but I know
24:57that there’s a lot of people out there
24:59that are listening to that same likable
25:01trustworthy voice that you have that are
25:04self-doubting themselves and saying how
25:07can I do it
25:08they’re actually looking at someone like
25:10yourself and saying he’s going through a
25:13podcast with a hundred and fifty nine
25:15episodes he’s admitted that it didn’t
25:18work out
25:19he’s kind of thought it through and now
25:21not only has he kind of thought about it
25:25and learned a lot about himself through
25:27the process but you’re not giving up
25:29you’re going to continue on and you’re
25:31not going to execute and I think what I
25:35hear it’s about really being authentic
25:37is really what i hear from you in other
25:40words we can all be inspired by Stephen
25:43early but let’s be our own person our
25:46own cells let’s learn about us
25:49be authentic but use his story successes
25:53and failures to sort of be authentic to
25:56ourselves and to inspire us APPL any
26:00otherwise they’re just going to be
26:01chronically overwhelmed stressed out
26:03ancient fatigue any other all those
26:05other mental states because you’re not
26:06being who you are
26:08they’re living out of alignment with who
26:10you are and that probably that the
26:13problem trying to help solve for people
26:14and and to give people faith and
26:16confidence is that you can get paid for
26:19who you are and how you all problem it’s
26:22delightful
26:23absolutely you know I heard you mention
26:25a few times 1i I heard you mention about
26:29anxiety about pressure and about
26:31strength and I talked to a lot of
26:34business people i talked to a lot of
26:36entrepreneurs I’ve actually worked with
26:38with many one of the things that I hear
26:42over and over and over again is things
26:45that they’ve done to sort of get over
26:48that pressure to get over that stress
26:50and you know in today’s world I now see
26:53that there are apps called common
26:55headspace and people that are learning
26:57meditation and people that are learning
26:59to sort of simplify their lives and
27:01streamline things are what do you do
27:04I mean because obviously it’s something
27:06that you’ve had to overcome we all have
27:10pressures we all have stresses in life
27:12but I guess it’s a matter of how do you
27:15deal with it what are some of the as you
27:19say hacks like because I think we look
27:22at strengthening body as a type of
27:25illness to be solved in the kind of it
27:29it is an illness and in our Western
27:32culture it we like to put a bandaid on
27:34the treat the symptoms right ensure that
27:37we never get that we never get that the
27:39loop cause so it i think i believe i
27:41meditate everyday i do all the
27:43government that you mention it turns up
27:46leaving my anxiety but I’m only kidding
27:51myself because a lot of time just
27:52treating the symptoms you know what I’ve
27:54challenged myself to do it you get the
27:55root cause of my anxiety and really for
27:59me together cause of that came through
28:01purging know I probably talked a lot
28:04about that on chuckle letting go to
28:06getting rid of crap in your life that no
28:09longer has any meaning that you’re not
28:11using and doing off a very elaborate
28:14verge of getting rid of your possessions
28:16getting rid of obligation getting rid of
28:19digital way getting rid of relationship
28:21because all that stuff and I usually
28:23recommend starting off with physical
28:25stuff because it’s tangible people
28:28business of a quick when of like I just
28:30cleaned my room i get rid of all that
28:31stuff and leaving lighthouse people get
28:34that but what they don’t get in and we
28:36do that over and over again you start
28:38getting with more physical top and and
28:41then so that digital clutter on your
28:43computer your phone it’s starting to get
28:45rid of stuff out of your head started
28:47clutter starting to kind of clear the
28:49air to start being like ha WI how much
28:52this bothers me and I had no idea this
28:54is the thing that’s been stressing me
28:56out because in America we think more
28:59they look better if we want to make a
29:01big change in our life that we have to
29:03add something into it but we really need
29:05to do is start learning how to subtract
29:07and continuously subtracting presence
29:09could they’re continually adding things
29:10your life every single day you have to
29:12learn how to get rid of stuff so even
29:14after and suckable i started my process
29:17of purchasing and it took me about a
29:19year and that’s what led me back to life
29:21skills that matter and really saying I’m
29:24committed to working align with my work
29:26habits and really understanding what
29:28those are and how i can communicate
29:30those two other people whoever might
29:32work with me one day again so the army
29:35huge advocate of that especially if
29:37you’re listening right now you’re like I
29:38have no idea what I want to do but I
29:40know whatever I’m doing right now I
29:41don’t want to do I advise purging
29:44because that is a great self awareness
29:46practice on that you can start really
29:49seeing like what do I like what do I
29:51don’t like just by the very action of
29:54letting go of crap and i think that is
29:56the thing that’s really reach my anxiety
29:59and also amateur you know we live in
30:00such a chaotic world our economy is
30:02changing so fast and furious in a way
30:04that it hasn’t in decade that we all
30:07feel super stressed out so overwhelmed
30:10that a way to regain a sense of control
30:12and making a choice to take I don’t want
30:15this thing in my life
30:17you can get rid of it that’s why do you
30:19have so that’s that’s kind of my may be
30:22unconventional approach to dealing with
30:24anxiety that way that’s what works for
30:26me
30:27purging I think that starting at the
30:29very goes all different girl I you know
30:34you you just talked a little bit about
30:35you know learning about you and people
30:37out there learning about themselves
30:40how do you how do you even go about it
30:44how do you how do you start I mean maybe
30:46some mynheer thing if you learn about
30:48healthy eating without you
30:50personality you learn about your
30:52strength of natural ability to learn
30:54about your value you know about your
30:56motivation you need to learn about
30:58anything holding you back your fears
31:00desires unrealistic expectation I you
31:05need to learn about your work II you
31:10know what is an ideal working look like
31:12pretty what is your optimal productivity
31:14time you need to learn about your energy
31:16heat as I alluded to earlier on a
31:18morning person i get my best foot down
31:20between 7am you every time
31:22that’s what i did my writing after that
31:23I don’t do any writing I don’t try to
31:25force it because i know that’s my
31:26bedtime so that’s something I want to
31:30really that’s really the heart of what
31:31i’m trying to create the lifestyle that
31:32matter is creating a workbook so you can
31:35go to that I could lead people through
31:36exercises we can really truly wondering
31:39about their values the motivation their
31:42their their strength the stuff that’s
31:44holding them back and really getting
31:46clear on their life
31:48what is the thing that they want to do
31:49in life because that’s the thing is I’ve
31:50learned on 41 that when I look back I
31:53kind of always been doing the same thing
31:55two different variations of that work
31:57our subconscious mind our inner self is
31:59always naturally job drawn to think that
32:02he probably later life that this is what
32:04I was meant to do is I love story i was
32:07a history major and love reading about
32:08other people’s lives how they did you
32:10successful what made them happy and
32:12that’s what I’m still doing you know
32:14I’ve done it has been that the common
32:16thread throughout my career I loved one
32:18of the things that I really connected
32:20with you and why you know I feel like
32:22you know like you’re a trusted friend
32:24and extremely likeable is our our our
32:27enjoyment of reading and books and I
32:30know that you’re you’re a big book
32:32reader i know that you reviewed several
32:35books going on your former podcast
32:38tell us tell us a few books that people
32:41can sort of look to to to really maybe
32:45help them get started or to get
32:47unstoppable that that you have found
32:49that have been most helpful to you
32:52probably since your failure of
32:55unstoppable
32:56well the first book I read when I was
32:58laid off with them like a few months of
33:00being laid off with rich dad poor dad by
33:02robert kiyosaki
33:03which totally validated and also change
33:07my mind about how to look at money so I
33:09big part of it the about really knowing
33:11yourself but people want to know the
33:12kind of a tangible thing people don’t
33:14know how am i gonna make money i got a
33:15pill that I put my lifestyle i get
33:18people so i think that the great book to
33:21pick up just really start understanding
33:22i think the key takeaway in that book it
33:24you are a bill and you have to pay
33:27yourself first
33:28we always worry about paying the
33:30landlord no mortgage for bank healthcare
33:33all that stop that thing don’t pay your
33:35built but pay yourself first and i
33:37opened on paying at least ten percent of
33:40their you come to yourself every single
33:42year I don’t care how much money you’re
33:44making that is how you build
33:45well-disciplined focus if you want to
33:48own yourself a look in your term pay
33:50yourself first
33:51I love a little bit more recently i love
33:55Marie condos book The Life magic of
33:58tidying up
33:59I be I’ve always considered without a
34:01pretty minimal person and not having all
34:03the stuff that book gave me permission
34:05to let go of all the lucky i kept out of
34:08guilt
34:09my family gave me a lot of kind of stuff
34:11from the past from our family and I was
34:14a history major they thought I’d be a
34:16good family archives but i realized that
34:19it didn’t mean anything to me I meant
34:20something to them and then I really
34:22should find a person who hit me jumping
34:24to and give it to them because just like
34:26we’re all trying to look for our own
34:28purpose every inanimate objects that we
34:30have in our possession possible has a
34:32purpose and deserves the limits on
34:33purpose so you should find a person to
34:35the trip means nothing to you and my
34:37wife and I have a will use it or we lose
34:39that so we’re using my great-grandmother
34:41wedding China Daily Dish where every
34:45single day that’s gray and bye-bye my
34:47dad mama my dad’s mother silver I know
34:51this is very unconventional trailer
34:53we’re going to sell it we’re going to
34:54use it and I think finally I don’t look
34:57at a powerful impact was the power of
34:58habit and as you know i’m a big believer
35:00and supporting your habit as the way you
35:03know your your your life is some of your
35:06habit of actions when you take the time
35:09to track how you spent your time or
35:11check your energy your check case than
35:12your manager track your feelings
35:15that really that so much more about you
35:17whatever they think you’re saying about
35:19yourself and your head how you think you
35:21are procedure the world
35:23I challenge anybody to start to track
35:26your time for one week for tracking got
35:28your money per week you will learn a lot
35:30about yourself you don’t even put prize
35:31yourself and a lot of that goes back to
35:34you whoever you’re spending a lot of
35:35time with our spending a lot of money
35:37with on those are the people you have to
35:39look at are they really bringing you in
35:42the direction you want to bring your
35:43life
35:44we’re gonna we’re gonna definitely
35:45linked to your 10 core self-awareness
35:48habits that you developed because i
35:51think that our trusted friends out there
35:52can certainly take advantage of them
35:55starting today can you just tell us one
35:57main one that you think that people can
36:00sort of start with today
36:02yes the first 1i was recommended to tell
36:04your story when people ask you going
36:07forward what do you do don’t tell them
36:10what you’re doing right now at that job
36:12or whatever it is that not making you
36:14feel very satisfied or happy tell them
36:16what you want to do because this was
36:18these are the things I’m looking for
36:20that create momentum because when you
36:22tell people what i wanted that even if
36:24it’s not totally figured out or you’re
36:25not even completely sure exactly what
36:27you want to do they
36:29it’s more authentic it is also it your
36:32your changing your mindset to look for
36:34so we always that it is possible to
36:36start changing your life if you are
36:38starting to change your identity by
36:40telling your story of where you want to
36:42go not just where you are and I think
36:45that is probably the most important for
36:47a habit to start practicing right now
36:49and you can do it it’s a little hard a
36:51little uncomfortable the first few times
36:53what happened that create engagement but
36:55a lot of you find a lot of people are
36:57excited about what you want to do buddy
36:59be able to help you have questions that
37:01might get you going to take that next
37:02step in the right direction so i think
37:05that’s so important because if you not
37:07telling people what it is you really
37:08want to do
37:09you’re staying trapped in your mind
37:11you’re going to keep the remains dr.
37:13never be able to do it so what is Steven
37:1560-second elevator pitch today
37:18my story is I want to help people we
37:21divide our lives around the world but we
37:23want to do we find more satisfying for
37:26because I believe everybody has an
37:28untold story that deserves to be told
37:31and I think a lot of people haven’t
37:33found their store yet so they gotta find
37:35that first before to be told that one of
37:38them and just in closing you’re involved
37:42with where you’ve always been involved
37:44with the new york state broadcasters
37:46association tell us that I know that you
37:48mentioned about your upcoming podcast
37:50maybe things that people out there can
37:54sort of link up to or get more
37:56information better wear something
37:57contact with you
37:58yeah but we’re finally right now is to
38:01go follow me on twitter at Stephen
38:04Morley ste PHCN wa r LLY and a lot of
38:09this broadcast project I in terms of my
38:12identity I do that as my past I don’t
38:14get out and get another important point
38:15when you’re younger story where you want
38:17to go don’t forget your past i think a
38:19lot of time when people go to the
38:20transformation process possibly be a
38:23think that’s going to just forget the
38:25past identity everything that you’ve
38:27done in the past value it helps build
38:29towards we’re going to go i’m still
38:31using all the different experience
38:33killed that i have gathered the
38:35velocities not 20 years of my career can
38:37put into the business so I so yeah I
38:41just want to have but you know that we
38:45have a very profitable my broadcast sell
38:47training opportunities and I would and I
38:49experiences but totally ready to move on
38:52to two questions here in closing and we
38:54really appreciate all your all your time
38:56I think that everyone out there is
38:58really going to gain quite a bit of
39:00information from from listening to this
39:03back and of course we’ll have the show
39:04notes and all the links to everything
39:06that we talked about today and I want to
39:09thank you for you know being so a
39:12flattering with your feedback and really
39:14really appreciate it so glad that i
39:16helped inspire you and that you’re doing
39:17a podcast i think that’s kind of
39:19exciting for me thing for me is that you
39:22took some of ideas and printing them
39:25into action
39:26for yourself and on your term and that’s
39:28as exciting
39:30well I’ll tell you what it taught me
39:33that ideas are ok but unless you
39:37actually execute on those ideas then
39:39nothing actually gets done so you have
39:42to take action
39:43I mean for me is the number one day and
39:46and and I’m doing it and the only one
39:48night you know you know he’s not turning
39:50into I haven’t have to become part of
39:52your life
39:53sure absolutely about that absolutely
39:56you know i’ll tell you what i mean we
39:58would just love to have you as a
40:00recurring segment guest on our podcast i
40:03think that even if it’s to answer one
40:05question from somebody out in the
40:08trusted friends audience i really think
40:10that people could really gain from that
40:12and maybe enclosing here maybe another
40:16water to actual practical tips that
40:19people can execute on like right away
40:21like right now because i’m excited i
40:24know everybody out there is excited and
40:27I think that that would be most helpful
40:28here in closing well as the entire story
40:33is one that I was recommend already
40:35discussed purging you know maybe even
40:37you know i’m not sure that that’s going
40:39to come out but whatever the next
40:40weekend goes and whether you’re single
40:43you’re married you have kids you know
40:45we’ll find i generally when I when I
40:48recommend a purge I is to do related
40:52items i think a lot of times people like
40:54to say i’m going to purge the bedroom
40:56ended up purchasing a home office but
40:58you’re forgetting about it’s really
41:00about purchasing items and what I mean
41:01by that is purchased clothes and take
41:04your clothes from wherever they are in
41:06your house the front hall closet in
41:08bedroom on another storage area bring
41:11them all together in one room and then
41:12put them together you will get rid of so
41:15much more stuff more quickly and also a
41:17big advocate that’s throwing stuff out
41:19but donate it and donate it that day
41:22don’t leave it hanging out but go
41:24research find out where you’re going to
41:25donate get that apt get out of the house
41:28because you want that satisfaction of a
41:30quick one of like oh my god I did it I
41:32got rid of a lot of stuff and show and
41:34the other thing built of comments to
41:36show that you can’t do think you can
41:38create changing
41:39action in your life it’s just the
41:40beginning of what you can do and then
41:43it’s really creating that are building
41:45up thats all compliments I trying to
41:49think of another habits I i’m also a big
41:55believer and I in terms of getting the
41:58creative juices flowing
42:00it’s walking because I this is another
42:03one of the may be unconventional
42:05recommendations of how to really get
42:08going sorry like keeping that thing I
42:10should go read your book I should go
42:12research something I should go to a
42:13particular some of our conference I
42:16think you should walk because we sit way
42:18too much nowadays we are not designed to
42:20set the amount of time that we do and
42:23then i’m actually leaving a book called
42:25dailies that your rituals how artists
42:27work a profile 250-plus artist writer
42:31than scientists throughout the ages and
42:33i can tell you the majority of them had
42:35some sort of walking regimen because
42:37they saw the importance of climbing
42:40their creative pump every single bag to
42:42the action of walking so if that’s
42:44something that is not part of your life
42:46find a way to start making part of it
42:48and the other time where you for walking
42:51it kind of like all living meditation
42:53that you can carve out that time to be
42:55thinking about what is that you want to
42:57do and actually a final piece of advice
42:58on the choices we’ve got the call of the
43:01friends coaching our once-a-week she’s
43:03very overwhelmed with her kind of day
43:06job because we want our work she’s
43:07making your money but you really want to
43:09spend more time building how herb
43:11business as a credit she doesn’t have as
43:14much time as we said was that you know
43:16what at least pretend to spend 5-10
43:20minutes and fauna in your studio thing
43:23thinking about what is that you want to
43:25do make a habit of your habits
43:28that’s really important so it starts
43:29becoming part of the last week we have a
43:31little beachhead thing this is where my
43:33life was going because I think a lot of
43:36times people think i need to carve out
43:37five hours a week to pick up that work
43:40about to do that and then they end up
43:42not doing it with it feel like they
43:43can’t commit to five hours they don’t do
43:45anything at all
43:46start small a big you know I think my
43:49repeated over and over again out sucka
43:50ball
43:51did you have small consistent actions
43:53have achievable goal taken perfect
43:55action do something every single day
43:58that we create that momentum that starts
44:00becoming part of what you do just like
44:02you’re eating and eating well you always
44:04our friend here on this podcast I know
44:07that I audience rooting for you
44:10many trusted friends and we know that in
44:15this particular podcast today there has
44:18been at least one or two three probably
44:21more practical things that people can
44:23implement today execute today and we’re
44:27so excited that we we had you on this
44:29podcast we just want to thank you very
44:32much and we’re excited to be here the
44:34next chapter of your story and we want
44:38to thank you again thanks again Stephen
44:40for everything thanks for letting really
44:42appreciate the opportunity to share my
44:43story and if anybody has any questions
44:45you reach out to Mitchell happened a
44:47question
44:49thank you take care now Steven by
44:50enclosing let me ask for my listeners
44:55help first please subscribe to my email
44:58list at Mitchell Chad row.com / sign up
45:02you’ll get all the full interview
45:04transcripts my ebook 30 tools to start
45:07up where I talk about these three
45:09resources and show 006 you’ll get the
45:14startup checklist education and training
45:16materials and other resources just by
45:19signing up at Mitchell Chad row.com /
45:22sign up
45:24[Music]
45:31back at Mitchell chatter dot-com / sign
45:38up homie boost the rankings of the
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46:04review on iTunes until next time
